Baby snailicide is bad and other things you find in Turkey

Right, so we live in Turkey. When we found out we were moving here, the girl was confused. It took a lot of  convincing to make her believe that we were not moving into Thanksgiving dinner. Anyway, we're here now.

The air gets in your lungs like mad. We just say we've got "Turkey". The Turkey is laughing at my poor sad little American OTC allergy medicine. "Bahaha, stupid American medication, you can't stop me!!!"

Then there's the tea. Cay. Pronounced Chai. Yeah. I love chai. I was so excited when we got here and everybody's going on about chai. And it's not that unreasonable. You hear about all of these spice markets and whatnot. I'm all like, "Whooo Chai!!!" Then I get a cup of tea and I'm like, "What's this malarkey?" It's Cay. Oy. Then I wonder why people drink hot tea in Turkey. I start to suspect psychosis. Then I had some... It was like Scooby Doo eating Scooby Snax.

What they don't really tell you is about the critters. We have these weird crows. I'm just going to say that a "murder" of crows started here. With these. They're like, zombie crows or something. But it's not all terrifying. We have hedgehogs. No squirrels, but hedgehogs. And snails... So many snails... When it rains, they come out everywhere. And they're always baby baby snails... All over the sidewalk. And every step you take...

Baby Snailicide...