Does Your Friendship Have a Large Carbon Footprint?

I've been thinking a lot about friendships. In a way, friendships sustain us. It is free therapy for sane people. It is validation for all of those crazy overwhelming moments. It is a comradery that says, "You're not alone." Friends are vital to living a happy life. The reason I've been thinking so much about friendships is because we have just moved (That's a whole different post), and I find myself in the same boat as my kids. I have to *gulp* make new friends. As moms, we're worried about our kids making friends, but what frequently slips our minds is that we need friends. We need a break from all the "Mommy, I'm hungry", "But I don't want to", and "Mama, I gotta go POOP!!!" Sometimes you just have to talk to someone whose butt you don't have to wipe. And I'll admit, there have been days when I have hung on every pleasantry given to me by the check out girl at the Walmart because she was the only adult I got to speak to that day. I will also admit that I probably over shared with her too. Oops. Making friends as an adult is hard. There's more social stigma attatched to everything and you're so concious of how you are perceived that sometimes it doesn't seem worth the risk to put yourself out there. That's how I was before I had kids. I just didn't get out of my house. But as a mom, I get out of my comfort zone much more often. I don't know if it's the freeing notion of nothing possibly being as embarrassing as cleaning up a pee puddle at a restaraunt or having to claim the kid that just stripped down to his bare behind at the playground, but I've found it easier to make friends. There are some perks to being an adult-friend-maker. First of all, you have a kind of litmus test for personalities. Through trial and error, you've kind of whittled down the types of people you get along with the best. You know what works for you. So... after a few days of eavesdropping, you can tell if someone is friend material. The second and probably most beneficial thing is school. Not yours, your kids. The preschool pick up line was just like a bar, you could pick up anybody there. You immediately have something in common. Oh, your son's in Mrs whats-her-face's class too? How does he do with nap time? And POW! Before you know it, you have a new friend. Which leads me to my last and final plus for us friendless grown-ups, it may seem obvious, but... KIDS!!! You have kids?!? Me too! Let's sit at the park and talk about them! I don't know the number of times I've made playdates for myself and just dragged my kids along. And it never fails, their kid does something crazy that your kid does, and you laugh about it and mutter something like, "Oh thank God, I thought I was the only one!" POW! Friend time! That's how the best friendships are formed. They're just kind of organic. They just happen. Sometimes completely by accident. Something else I've learned from my extensive friend trials is that it's totally okay if your house was hit by Hurricane (Your Kid's Name Here), mine was too! You know, except my kid... until we have a play date, then it was both Hurricanes (babies qualify as Tropical Storms, just fyi). But, that lady on the bench has the knees ripped out of her jeans too (I'm sure there are a million moms who are anxiously awaiting the return of grunge... just so we're in style again.), and if you look a little closer at the woman at the store, there's a spit up stain on her shirt, and Lord help you if you open my closet door (THAT'S how my house "stays so clean".). We all have our things, and the sooner we own them and accept them, the more fun we'll have! So... whether your friendship was organically grown or factory farmed, go have fun with your friend and try to remember that it's rarely socially acceptable to pick another adults nose.