A bag of cats

My brain has something in common with Loki the trickster god. It's a bag of cats. You can smell the crazy coming off me. 

My mental health practitioners would frown upon me using the word "crazy". My therapist two therapists ago used to ask me if I thought I was crazy when I said I was crazy. But you get the idea. I've been in country since September and I'm on my second psychologist and my very first psychiatrist ever. It's really very exciting to have someone who specializes in crazy drugs! 

I was first diagnosed with depression in a round about fashion when I was something like 16. My family doctor thingy prescribed me an antidepressant. That was it. No, you have depression, go see a therapist. Just meds and on my way. So I took them cause duh. And they worked for a really long time until they didn't. Then about three? four? five? years ago they stopped, so I switched to a diffrent antidepressant. It worked out alright. With a side of antianxiety for those hail mary moments. Then a death in the family, a move, some kind of strange world with no real purpose that was kind of a purgatory of sorts happened. About 32 appointments into my prolific career as a patient of the most patient therapist I've ever met, she diagnosed me with borderline personality disorder. WTF?!?! But it's true. All of it! Bag of cats. Then a month later we moved again. And now you're all caught up.  That was my Doofenschmirtz flashback.

Anyway, I'm now on my very first antipsychotic. I feel very Girl, Interrupted, except not really. It's really really helped. I've made it through multiple "cycles" without wanting to run away or cause immense physical harm. So, naturally, I'm psyched!!! (see what I did there?) I actually had a moment last week when I was just fine. We were half way through the day and all of a sudden I had one of those Keanu meme whoa moments. 

So, Yay, me!!! That's pretty much all I wanted to talk about was that I'm finally on some meds that I think are actually doing really good. They make me hella sleepy, but they're really good. And things are good. And I think I might actually be coming out of some kind of funk, so that's exciting. And this is a good time to have a mental health thing. There's awareness out the wazoo! Yay, interwebs! Yay hashtags! Yay!